If achieving a specific outcome matters to you, here’s some advice: Don’t want that outcome. Instead, hope for it. That suggestion is not semantic wordplay. Hoping instead of wanting can mean the difference between achievement and disappointment. Here’s why:
If you say I want…., you are describing a desire for something you don’t have now. It’s nothing more than a description of your orientation to that something: namely, you’d like having it. The problem is that thinking or saying you want something can leave you wanting—as in, lacking—a sense of power to increase the chance of obtaining that something.
If you say I hope…., now you are talking about a different orientation toward that desirable outcome. Unlike want, hope is an emotion (different from desire) that you feel now…linked to your belief about the possibility of experiencing that desired outcome in the future. Hope motivates you to act.
Imagine going through treatment. Saying I want to recover doesn’t motivate you, but rather leaves you vulnerable to the whims of nature, chance, and other people’s actions. In contrast, saying I hope to recover acknowledges the uncertainty while attesting to your belief that recovery is possible for you. Having hope—that combination of feeling and belief—helps you find the courage and fortitude needed to pursue health-promoting steps, which may improve your quality of life now while living with the uncertainty.
Saying, I hope,
helps set the stage
for feelings of hope to arise.
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